It Doesn't Look Good

I hate to rush to any conclusions, here, but the adoption front doesn't look good. I only say that, because things continue to be very slow with the referral numbers and there seems to be some chatter on various blogs as to the reason why. Overall, it sounds like both the US and ET are getting pressure to be sure that all adoptions are ethical. I feel very certain that our agency does everything possible to ensure that their adoptions are ethical. Naturally my biggest fear is that they would close Ethiopia and not allow any more adoptions. Of course, I would rather them close it than to blindly allow baby trafficking, but I'm sure you all understand what I'm saying. I would assume that parents that have already been through the Ethiopian adoption process were a little afraid of the same scenario, so again, I'm not saying it is going to happen at all, but it is on my radar right now.

I must say that the title of my blog is actually a great little reminder for me in this whole uncertain process. We will just keep writing in pencil. We don't know what direction God will take us, but we are certain that we didn't make a mistake by jumping on this train to who knows where? It may mean that we have a little Ethiopian child in 6 months, or it could mean that we adopt a child from down the street in 5 years. You just never know. A couple in my parents church started an adoption in Haiti and it was going to take a LONG time to get their kids, but then the earthquake hit and within weeks they had their kids. Who knows what strange twists and turns adoption will take? I am praying that Ethiopia stays open, but ultimately, I'm praying for whoever joins our family in the future.

A Much Different Kind of Baby!

Today I got an amazing gift! It's not quite as great as a baby, but I will be babying it! My parents, to whom I am ever grateful to (and for) were willing to part with their Conservatory Yamaha grand piano and send it my way. It is the piano that I grew up playing. It's weird how when I was growing up, practicing for an hour or two seemed like an eternity, while I would give anything to capture and hour of two of practicing now! I'll admit, today, my kids were a touch neglected, while I tried to acclimate my new ivories. Compared to what I had, it is like going from a Chevette to a Rolls Royce. It is so exciting. Dave spent about an hour working on "I Love Coffee, I Love Tea" and trying to play his right and left hand together on the black keys. He's already complaining of sore hands. Even Spencer was inspired to play his only song - Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater. I wonder if our kids will play and if I'll be their teacher?

On the adoption front - no change. I think there is an overall slow down in Ethiopia, so we're just hangin'. Just hoping that eventually God will bring about the right child at the right time. I'm sure he will. We haven't heard anything about the little boy that we inquired about that is 3, except that the other family is still waiting to get test results back. We are still pretty sure the other family will be moving forward with the adoption. The cool thing about even thinking about getting a child off of the waiting child list is that we actually can consider it at this point, because of the anonymous giver. I still wonder who they were and if they know the kind of impact they have had in our process mentally, spiritually and ,of course, financially. Maybe it will even mean that we get two kids. Hold on - I'm getting a little carried away here! On that note, goodnight all.

Christmas and All

I really do love Christmas! Even though it can be stressful and crazy, it sure is fun and it has become increasingly more fun with kids that kind of get it. Of course, they are still a little more into the presents, than in the amazing gift of the birth of Jesus, but hopefully, that will come. At least when you ask Spencer who's birthday it is, he doesn't say "Moses'" anymore, so we are on the right track.

Last weekend, we got to go to Pagosa for the beginning of a HUGE snow storm. We got to ski one day (in over a foot of powder), of which Spencer skied the 2nd half with us, and we got some serious sledding in, too. It was great to see most of the extended family on Dave's side and to do a little early celebrating. The last couple of days have been spent at home, with my parents, which has also been a ton of fun. I found my first two geocaches on our first annual Christmas hike.

In the world of adoption, not too much is happening. The process seems to really be slowing down, but I can't say that it is some big surprise. When I think of international adoption, the words fast, smooth, and easy are far from my lips. I think it is more the rule than the exception that international adoptions are slow, full of waiting, and full of ambiguity. I keep wondering if we'll have another one running around the Christmas tree next year. Dave thinks, yes, and I think, no, which is weird, because typically I am the optimist. Either way, we'll at least be closer by next year.

Referrals still exist!

Yeah! Finally a little movement with referrals. It probably won't affect us in the long run, because we just moved one number closer on the infant girl list, but I was just relieved to see a referral and to know that the world of adoption didn't close it's doors and forget to tell us. So, yeah and yeah for the family that just got the referral. I can't even imagine what that day will be like!!!!

So, I'm assuming that the family that has priority for the little CUTIE I talked about in my last post, will accept his referral. I guess they are getting more medical testing done. Supposedly, it will happen in a couple of weeks, so that probably means about a month in adoption language. I think I feel totally OK about it. Leah is 2 years old right now and I just LOVE the age, (minus the temper tantrums). I love hearing new words every single day, I love seeing her laugh at things that are actually funny, and I love seeing her learn to jump, stand on one foot and just do new things each day. I would kind of miss that stage, if we got a three year old. I'm sure an older child would be learning new things and just sucking up information daily, too. Anyway, I'm so happy to see the little guy find a home either way. I'm sure I'll be a little sad (selfishly) when I hear of his official acceptance, but that is OK.

Wow - while I was writing this ANOTHER REFERRAL rolled in and this time it was for a little boy, so now both the girl list and the boy list will move! How exiting to finally get to change some numbers!!!!!

Ten Percent Chance

I'll just jump right in. There still haven't been any changes to our numbers. I'm sure our agency cringes every time the phone rings as many, many families are waiting for a little good news. I certainly wouldn't want to be fielding those calls. However, there is this crazy slight possibility that maybe by some slight chance if the stars all align in the right way, that something could change for us. There is this cutie little kiddo on the waiting kids list that we inquired about the other day. We've had our eye on the little fellow for awhile, but his status changed from special needs to not special needs and the second I heard that, I called. (I know that sounds terrible and if we ended up with a special needs child, then that would be that, but anyway . . . ) Evidently, another family or two called before us and are considering him, but we are on a short list at this point for this little guy. On one hand, I think, I don't want to be doing this just to speed things up, but on the other hand, we said we'd be open to wherever this process leads. So, again, it all comes down to just knowing that God will place the right child into our family. So basically, we could add to our family anywhere between a few months to a few years. For now, we are loving the Christmas season with our family as it stands.

Self Proclaimed Stuffer

I haven't written anything in awhile, because it has been awhile since anything in the adoption world has happened. It has been over a MONTH since we have moved on the referral list. After the first couple of weeks, it was fine, because it's in God's hands, right? Well, now I think I might be starting to panic a little. You see. . .I am like a walking manifestation of anxiety symptoms. You would never know it, because I am seemingly an easy going person and I love to laugh and I am really funny (just kidding). I think I'm a stress stuffer, because I rarely think I am stressed. I stuff my stress, so it manifests itself in physical ways and then I stress about those. All of that to say, I think I am either dying of some disease or I'm getting a little stressed about the list not moving. This morning, I decided that it is probably the latter. The fact that I haven't even wanted to write on my blog or check the list is a testament to my self proclaimed stress stuffer syndrome. I don't even want to think about the adoption, because it's a little to disappointing right now:( I really, truly, and deeply believe that God has the perfect child for us and will bring that child to us at the perfect time, but it is definitely not a belief derived from feelings, because I certainly don't feel that way right now. I'll look for a couple of semi interesting pictures. There is one of Leah's first skiing trip and one of Spencer at his Thanksgiving party.